The more I grow and mature, I realise that I’m undeniably, immeasurably human, flawed, capable of hiding things, memories, no matter how much knowledge I absorb, I can’t outrun my humanity, I can’t out-think my hurt, I can’t find an equation to stop the invading situations of life. Being vulnerable is something that is to be LEARNED. To be taught.
The point, the underlying suggestion is that the most learned scholar is a being, capable of being affected by feelings, by people, by situations.
A couple of months ago, I fell. Simple fall. In a split second I broke my elbow. It was a pretty nasty break and minutes later a swelling was protruding from my arm, the size of a golf ball. I am incredibly blessed that we live in a country with advanced healthcare capacities and so my arm was mended with some wire, pins and a couple of months of physio. I have almost complete function back now and for that I am thankful. The point I am making is how delicate we humans are. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, we are sensitive beings-easily affected by the situations that envelope our hurtable bodies.
Each one of us has the capacity to hurt and be hurt and each one of us has the capacity to influence and to be influenced. You see, I think that the very fact that we are so susceptible to breakage, to damage, to pain, also means that we are equally affected by positive influences. I suspect that it is the reason why empowering words have a large impact on us, the reason why life-giving actions are a pivotal factor in changing a persons life.
As humans we contain an ability to either construct or destruct and most of us, including me, do both on a daily basis. From observation of myself alone, I can see that often my motives for doing things, for saying things, revolve largely around me. I am not pointing this out to put myself down, but rather to accept my nature as a human and to understand that I alone can only do so much for myself and for the world around me. If I want to make a substantial difference, I need help, from a source that is not controlled by me. Supernatural help.
I’ve been praying recently that my relationships with the people I love, with the people I interact with on a daily basis are honestly less about my input into them than I’ve made them in the past. Because I am so flawed, so delicate and so human. And so I want my family and my friends to receive a love that flows from me that is less Laura-like and more like the love of the One who created me. I want the love that gushes from inside to be based on values that honour God and honour people, and not on just my desires to be a good daughter, a good sister, a good friend.
I am thankful that I have a desire to love the people around me, something which I think is admirable and necessary but I want to be a representation of Him, the One who made me and so I want more of His love; for me and through me.
Lately I’m realising that God is so much bigger than I will EVER be able to comprehend and so imagine what would life be like if I spent a little less time trying to do things on my own strength and instead spent a little more of my precious time relying on the strength of the God who MADE heaven and earth. It is incomprehensible to me that the same God who made all the beautiful nature that surrounds me is the same God who has a record of the hairs on my head, the same God who I whisper to as I fall into a gentle slumber at night, the same God who made the universe, who has taken the time to heal and restore me, and who wants to work through me, who wants to work through you.
So this Valentine’s Day, my prayer is that we would have more love at work in our lives. Love that comes from the source of life. Love that heals and love that nourishes, love that fills and love that satisfies. Love that looks at the delicate nature of us humans, the selfish nature of us humans and has selfless compassion. Loving, I don’t think, is easy but we don’t have to love all on our own. Our love comes from Him. He who created us will give us the capacity we need to love. Know today, as you go about your business, that you are loved and that your presence on this earth matters.
Lots of love,